Meet four same-sex couples who took the plunge in San Francisco in 2004 and learn why they can't wait to walk down the aisle one more time.
The rapturous crowd that swarmed San Francisco City Hall in February 2004 -- only to have their same-sex unions annulled four months later -- may turn out to be the most married group in America. Many had already had private marriages or commitment ceremonies before the blitz on City Hall and now plan to marry again now that the California supreme court has overturned the state’s ban on same-sex marriages.
“I’ll get married in every state if I have to,” says performer Heather Gold. As a Canadian, Heather was able to marry her partner in Canada last December. When the California supreme court ruling came down, “my first call was to Stacey,” she says. “My second was to the caterer.”
Writer Jewelle Gomez, who was turned away -- license in hand -- when the marriages were halted in 2004, remembers the excitement of that time. “I walked up and down the line outside City Hall,” she says. “I hugged people I knew. I hugged people I didn’t know.”
The Advocate found that thrill has been renewed by the court’s May decision. Here are four couples -- married four years ago -- who now plan to retie the knot.
Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon
Lesbian icons Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon have been together 55 years. Their lifelong political activism made them a perfect choice to lead the charge in 2004. Kate Kendell, head of the National Center for Lesbian Rights, invited them to City Hall. “They made it easy on us,” Phyllis recalls. “They came to pick us up.” She and Del were the first same-sex couple to be married in San Francisco. “They kept it pretty secret because they didn’t want their enemies to rush to court,” she says. “The next day there were a lot of people there.”
Phyllis believes that gays and lesbians have a better chance of defeating an anti–gay marriage ballot initiative in California this November than they did in 2000. “In the eight years since that vote, a lot of young people have grown up and are voting, and gay marriage is not a big problem for them,” she says. “Also, more adults have met gay and lesbian people and they know more about us. So I think we have a good chance. We have to work hard. It is our right to marry.”
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Marler is freelance writer based in San Francisco and a frequent contributor to The Advocate.