Health Promo 03 (Getty) | Advocate.com
||  News  ||
 
08/12/06-08/14/06

McGreevey's boyfriend throws birthday bash in New Jersey

To celebrate James McGreevey's 49th birthday this week, his boyfriend threw a party for the former governor at the couple's new home in Plainfield, N.J. The idea for the 50 friends and family members who attended was to surprise McGreevey as he returned from a trip to China, where he was negotiating a deal to bring a Kean University branch to the Chinese mainland.

What a difference two years can make. It was August 12, 2004, when McGreevey took a spectacular political plunge with his now famous "I am a gay American" speech, spoken solemnly before a national television audience. Three months later the first-term Democrat left office.

In the 24 months since his declaration, McGreevey has gone from closeted to out. From married to partnered. Shunned to accepted. Conflicted to content. "He's a totally different person," said New Jersey state senator Ray Lesniak, McGreevey's friend and colleague for 25 years. "He is so much more comfortable with who he is; you can see it in his body language."

With a new house, a still-new relationship with Australian financial adviser Mark O'Donnell, and a new book about to be released, McGreevey seems to have found his stride. But Lesniak said the nation's first openly gay governor, who is contractually bound by his publisher from talking to the media before his memoir hits bookstores next month, is still molding his identity as a gay American.

Following his stunning announcement that he'd had an affair with a man and would resign, McGreevey headed upstate, where he collapsed emotionally, too distraught even to get out of bed, according to Lesniak. But the former governor was soon up and about, leaning on friends, family, and faith as he began a long and difficult process of reassembling his life as he wanted it to be.

Today, that life is quite full. His sprawling house is alive with pets and parties, like the birthday bash, typically showcasing a guest list that combines a mix of McGreevey's new gay friends, old political chums such as Lesniak, and the former governor's parents. He's got his preschool-age daughter, a frequent presence, who he is raising along with his second wife. Then there's his work: representing Kean University in the China talks, plus other education and antipoverty projects.

And there's the book. Due in stores on September 19, The Confession is the memoir of McGreevey's rise, fall, and resurrection. It traces his life through two failed marriages; his rapid political rise to the governor's office; and the sudden, public implosion of his political career.

For now, the details contained in the book are a closely guarded secret. The only hint at what it says came from limited excerpts released in May, which told the story of a troubled man resorting to anonymous sexual trysts at highway rest stops as he wrestled with desires frowned on by his Roman Catholic faith and his family.

Lesniak calls the book a "totally honest" political memoir in which not all New Jersey politicians are portrayed favorably. Though McGreevey is not out to settle any scores, he did want to be truthful and helpful to others undergoing similar struggles, Lesniak said.

One recent poll shows most New Jerseyans don't care about the book. The survey released this week by the Monmouth University Polling Institute found that eight in 10 of McGreevey's former constituents have no interest in reading it, and only one in 20 await its publication with a lot of interest.

The book is to be launched with a splash. A two-month book tour is being planned by publisher Regan Books. It kicks off with an appearance on The Oprah Winfrey Show on September 19 and is to be followed by a flurry of other TV spots and book signings. (Angela Delli Santi, AP)

Keywords:  McGreevey 
Related stories from Advocate.com
© 2009 Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Reader Comments

These comments are reproduced as written by visitors to this Web site. They have not been edited for content, grammar, or spelling. The viewpoints appearing here are those of the writer, and do not necessarily reflect the opinion or views of advocate.com, The Advocate, or its affiliates.

Be the first to comment on this story.

Back to top

Submit a comment for this story:

*Type your comment here (Required, 1000 characters max.):

*Name (Required): 

*Hometown (Required): 

*E-mail address: (Required, but will not be displayed)

Is this comment for publication? 
Yes   No

Daytime phone number: (Required for print publication only and will not be displayed)

Please enter the words you see in the box, in order and separated by a space. Doing so helps prevent automated programs from abusing this service.

  

If you would like to submit a comment for posting, please fill out the form above. 

All comments submitted via this form are subject to posting or publication. (To send a private letter to an Advocate editor or writer, please use the e-mail button at the top of the page, or use snail mail.) If you would like your comment considered for publication in The Advocate magazine, please include your full name, your city of residence, and a phone number where you can be reached during business hours so that we can confirm your identity. Your e-mail address and telephone number are strictly confidential and will not be shared or used for any purpose other than to contact you about your comment.

See the Contact page for sending comments for reasons other than responding to Advocate editorial and news stories.

Please note that comments sent by fax or snail mail are unlikely to be posted, although they will be considered for publication along with all letters received via e-mail or via this Web page. Comments that chiefly concern Advocate.com content will be considered for posting only on the Web site. The Advocate reserves the right to edit submitted comments for grammar, spelling, obscenities, or libel; we will, however, do our best to preserve the original comment's style and intent. Comments considered for publication in The Advocate magazine may also be edited for length.

More Exclusives
  • Great American Couple
    In an exclusive excerpt from his new book, Hollywood Bohemians: Transgressive Sexuality and the Selling of the Movieland Dream, Brett L. Abrams explores the relationship between Cary Grant and Randolph Scott, who led homosexual lives right under everyone's nose.
  • Mormons Gone Wild
    After one man undresses missionaries for his calendar, LDS Church–owned Brigham Young University strips him of his degree.
  • Constructive Impatience
    Stung by the Warren decision, GLAAD's former executive director Joan Garry offers the Obama transition team some sage advice.
  • Boxer Goes Trans for Eli Stone
    Often perceived as male by confused casting agents, boxer-body builder turned actor Dallas Malloy felt a deep connection to the trans minister she plays on Eli Stone.
  • Mamma Mia! Rises Again
    Meryl Streep and company managed to top Harry Potter and Titanic at the U.K. box office, and now Mamma Mia! is poised to break similar records on DVD. Director Phyllida Lloyd talked to Advocate.com about bringing one of the biggest musicals of all time to the big screen.
  • The Other White Meat
    As one of the subjects of the documentary about the drag pageant circuit, Pageant, opening in select theaters, and one of the contestants on RuPaul's Drag Race, premiering next month on Logo, Victoria "Porkchop" Parker may not look or act like your typical female impersonator, but make no mistake, she is one of the best.
  • The Religious Defense
    In an excerpt from her new book, Bulletproof Faith: A Spiritual Survival Guide for Gay and Lesbian Christians, author Candace Chellew-Hodge incorporates the wisdom of Xena: Warrior Princess to illustrate her theories as to how gay and lesbian people of faith can protect themselves from those who attack their views.
  • Photo Finish
    Did Prop. 8 backlash cause art censorship -- or its reversal -- at Brigham Young University? Could be, as BYU photography student J. Michael Wiltbank found when his contribution to a two-week-long art exhibition -- eight pairs of benign portraits, each depicting an LGBT-identified BYU student alongside a supportive friend -- had been removed.
  • The Divine Miss M.
    Since the death of performer Wayland Flowers in 1988, his over-the-top puppet creation Madame has been seen only sporadically. But with the launch of her new casino tour, Madame is back.
  • Whither NLGJA?
    The leading professional organization for LGBT journalists is facing a crisis that threatens its very survival. In a changing media landscape and a tough economy, how does a small nonprofit live up to its mission and retain members?
  • The Road to Equality
    Barbara Boxer, the U.S. senator from California, understands why her gay constituents are furious over Rick Warren's role in the inauguration -- it feels like Proposition 8 redux.
  • A Call to Action for Barack Obama
    In the wake of the decision by President-elect Barack Obama to select Reverend Rick Warren to give the invocation at his inauguration, Equality California executive director Geoff Kors calls on Obama to live up to his promise of "One America" and prove he is the ardent supporter of LGBT equality he claims to be.
  • Gays Shut Out of Cabinet
    As if the news of antigay pastor Rick Warren's invitation to deliver Obama's inaugural invocation weren't insulting enough to LGBT Americans, we're now hit with the reality that no openly gay people will be seated at the cabinet table to weigh in on the next antigay flap.
  • Wading Your Way Through Hollywood
    Reichen Lehmkuhl switches hats for his second column and leaves the activist at the door as he offers some sage advice for Hollywood hopefuls. Whether you're gay or straight, what Reichen has to say about "talent" puts the business that is entertainment into perspective.
  • The Better Angels?
    President-elect Barack Obama's choice of Rick Warren to give the invocation at his inauguration puts LGBT Americans on notice: While the next four years hold unprecedented promise for our rights, we may sometimes feel forsaken.
  • Stage Doubt, Screen Doubt
    On Broadway, Doubt -- the story of a steely nun facing off against a heroic priest, whom she fixates on for giving special attention to the school’s only black (effeminate) kid -- worked because of a top notch cast and its unique brand of stylized narrative. If only the excellent Meryl Streep and Viola Davis were enough to make the movie work quite so well.
  • People of the Year: Al Gore, Chad Griffin, and Lawrence King
    This week Advocate.com is going to highlight our remaining People of the Year, who range from activists to entertainers, politicians to students. Today we take a look at environmentalist Al Gore, political strategist Chad Griffin, and slain student Lawrence King.
  • Dame Edna's Fond First Farewell
    As Dame Edna prepares to bid audiences adieu with her First Farewell Tour (take that, Cher), she sits down with Advocate.com to talk about her maybe gay son, Michelle Obama's dresses, and her plans for matrimony in America.
  • Push for 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' Review Gains Steam
    In the last week both Gen. Colin Powell and the Joint Chiefs chairman, Adm. Mike Mullen, have gone on record about reviewing the military's gay ban, leading some D.C. insiders to conclude that the incoming administration has put the wheels in motion behind the scenes.