Help Her Kick the Matlock Habit
Roku's new fun-size streamer, the Roku Streaming Stick, is the perfect mom gift, especially if she hasn't updated her vieweing guide since Murder, She Wrote went off the air. The stick is crammed with all of Roku's popular features and a great selection of streaming entertainment (over 1,000 channels and 31,000 movies); you can send Netflix, YouTube, and your own videos from your smartphone or tablet to your TV; it can be controlled with your mobile device; there are buttoms for Netflix and Amazon Instant Video; and it fits in the palm of her hand. Just plug it into the back of her TV (and if your mom is over 60, perhaps explain how to use it) and she'll be the master of her entertainment universe. $49.99, Roku.com
Remind Her She's Sexy
This works if the mother in your life is your wife or baby mama, who spends half the day wiping spittle off her sweatshirt. Remind her she's always sexy to you with Ardency Inn's limited-edition Punker Smoky Eye Kit, a trio of rock star makeup essentials -- Punker Original Smoky Shadow, the World's Baddest Eyeliner, and Unrivaled Volume and Curl Lash Wax -- designed to create a rock star smoky eye look in an instant. $39, Sephora.com
Get Her the Ideal Man
Is mom widowed, divorced, or single? Show her you have no problem with straight folks by giving her Susan Anderson's titillating how-to manual, Hands On: The Manual for Getting the Job Done, which illustrates 10 easy-to-follow home improvement projects with instructions and dozens of photos of hunky handymen (or models impersonating hunky handymen). Anderson, a Salon and Los Angeles Times regular, previously shot the best-selling Porn for Women series, so you know she knows how to capture a man. $10, Amazon.com
She's Alive ... With Science
Sure, it's usually mom who is worried you're dead in a ditch any time you don't return a phone call within 15 minutes, but that doesn't mean she too shouldn't have the responsibility of being wired 24/7. Enter the awesome RadioShack Slim-Style Portable Power Bank, which charges smartphones, E-readers, MP3 players, digital cameras, and GPS receivers for up to 17 hours and is the size of a credit card. This coo, travel must-have even has an auto-off feature that automatically powers down/maintains charge when not in use. $19.99 and up, RadioShack.com
Brunch in the City By the Bay
At San Francisco's Mandarin Oriental, locals and visitors will be taking their moms to the famous Mother's Day Brunch at Brasserie S&P on Sunday. The gay-fave brunch features typical breakfast favorites, a chef's carving station, seafood platter, desserts, and bottomless mimosas. and you can prearrange to have a bouquet of flowers presented to Mom upon arrival (or you can give her a gift card for one of the hotel's spa treatments, like the the Diamond Brilliant package --which includes the Natura Bisse Diamond Brilliant Facial and Magnetic Manicure and Pedicure). (Editor's note: For reservations or flowers call or email in advance; 415-986-2020 or email mosfo-dining@mohg.com.) $85 buffet; the rest varies, MandarinOriental.com/SanFrancisco
De-Clutter Her Home
Is she constantly looking for stuff among her many piles, boxes, and drawers? Then hook the ol' gal up with the very cool Cabidor (from Hingenuity, get it?), which turns any door into portable storage space, taking advantage of the waste space behind doors and making efficient and effective storage areas out of unused space in the kitchen, bedroom, bathroom, or garage (well, basically any room with a door). The deluxe edition comes with an attached mirror, making it even more attractive. (It installs in minutes but is a lot easier with two people, so even if she's a hardy butch gal, expect to help the lady out just this once.) $129 and up, Cabidor.com
The Perfect Lesbian Vacation
If your mum is queer or your baby mama needs a break, consider this: Olivia Travel, the world's largest lesbian travel company, has announced its first-ever health and wellness program at Hawaii's five-star Mauna Lani Bay Hotel & Bungalows, August 30-September 5. The usual big names and fun events will be offered, but on the wellness side one of the big draws this trip isn't a lesbian but best-selling health author Dr. Wayne Dyer (a man who will be surrounded by lesbians). Prices vary, Olivia.com
Rocking Mamas
By now most people know that the Sol Republic Tracks Headphones offer the perfect mix of sound, style, and tech, and the FreeFlex design means they can withstand heavy abuse -- in my case, a puppy who thinks headphones are actually dog treats. But the new Tracks AIR Wireless Headphones by Sol Republic x Motorola are the best: amazing 150-foot wireless range with a 15-hour battery life, the same great sound clarity and deeper bass, and dual-device connectivity. $199, RadioShack.com
Tap Her Spiritual Side
Psychic Tori Hartman, who is highly popular with lesbians, has a new oracle deck out from Watkins Publishing next month called Chakra Wisdom Oracle Cards: The Complete Spiritual Toolkit for Transforming Your Life, which unlike other sets include the LGBT experience as part of the norm of everyday life. If you don't understand what an oracle deck is, this is not the best gift for your mom. But if she's a child of the '70s, a believer, or deeply curious person, this just might be a great gift for her. $15.45, Amazon.com
A Book, a Table, and the Most Famous Lesbian Photographer Ever
It's fitting that Hollywood's Chateau Marmont played host to the book launch of TAaschen's latest book; it's a star-studded spectacle worthy of all the fawning it's sure to get. Annie Leibovitz's limited-edition SUMO- size book is a moving tribute to her prodigious career, and it comes on a custom-made tripod stand designed by Marc Newson. The book is so massive, covering 40 years of her work, that it took several years for Leibovitz to curate images. The collector's edition is available in four different dust jackets: Whoopi Goldberg, gay artist Keith Haring, or musicians David Byrne or Patti Smith. This limited edition (only 10,000 signed and numbered copies) begins at $2,500; leather-bound art edition is $5,000, Taschen.com
A Book That Doesn't Come With Its Own Table
Moms love books from their daughters, and there are a handful worthy of exchange this year: Letters Never Sent by Sandra Moran is about a 1930s relationship between two women and one of the women's daughter's discovery of that relationship in unsent letters she finds after her mother's death in the 1990s. Also worthy: updated 20th anniversary edition of Motherless Daughters, which inspired the HBO doc The (Dead Mothers) Club (which premieres this Sunday and features Rosie O'Donnell and Jane Fonda) and Letters From Motherless Daughters (based on letters the author received) offers a reassuring reminders of why most moms are worth celebrating while they are still with us and how we cope when they aren't. $9 and up, Amazon.com
When Only (Inexpensive) Jewelry Will Do
Got the perfect PFLAG mom? Then she'll love one of Joseph Nogucci's Rainbow Pride Bracelets. The swirl of rhodium-plated charms offers an understated visual reminder of tolerance, support, and hope, and part of the proceeds benefits the It Gets Better Project. $39, JosephNogucci.com
Beauty Without a Price
I'm now in love with Beauty Collection's Sonya Dakar 
SYN-AKE Venom Facial (a facial using a synthetic version of the temple viper snake venom, stem cells, microdermabrasion, and some other magic that makes you look like you've had fillers and Botox without all the horrible needles, swelling, and toxins in your body). While there are a handful of Beauty Collection Salons in California, aesthetician Carol Behrens at the West Hollywood branch is so popular folks drive from miles around to visit her. Even better: Athird of her clients are gay men, which means you can have a mommy and me date and not feel like the only guy on the set of Steel Magnolias. Best yet: Behrens offers a $60-a-month-facial club (that's less than half the normal price), so if you fall in love you can afford to go back, with or without your mum. Prices vary, BeautyCollection.com
It's Always Tea Time
You no longer need to be a fussy British lady to enjoy tea, and if Mom has high cholesterol, you have even more reason to get her some. A new study shows that bergamot, the key ingredient in Earl Grey tea, lowers cholesterol as well as statin drugs. The best Earl Grey comes from Samovar, the super LGBT-friendly tea lounge. And if mom's an eco-chick, combine the tea and a basket of treats with Cassie Liversidge's beautifully illustrated new guidebook, Homegrown Tea: An Illustrated Guide to Planting, Harvesting and Blending Teas and Tisanes, which teaches readers how to bypass the store and plant, grow, and harvest their own tea plants (no yard needed; you can turn your balcony or windowsill into a luscious tea garden). Yes, please! Tea: $21 and up, SamovarLife.com; Book: $17, Amazon.com
Nothing's as Comfortable as Warm Socks
It's not summer yet, plus if Mom lives in someplace like, oh, say rural southeasterm Idaho where my mother-in-law does, she'll only get a break from the freezing cold for two months or so. That's where Heat Holders Thermal Socks come in. They're made from a specially developed heavy bulk yarn that has extreme thermal qualities -- and with Heat Holders ladies don't have to settle for socks that make us look like we're mountain climbing; these come in cerise (which I think is officially "pink for feminists"). $15.99, HeatHolders.com
But Nothing Feels Better Than Great Hair
And the hottest new find is GG Gatsby's new hair care line, Straight Away, which is 100 percent vegan, never animal-tested, with hydrolyzed protein and keratin that's guaranteed to seal out humidity, prevent frizz, and make even the unruliest of locks look good. Plus Mom will get a kick when you give her the Set it Straight balm and tell her it didn't work for you but she might like it. $9.99 and up, GGGatsby.com
A Mommy and Me Mani-Pedi
Launched by three sisters, Jamberry Nails are the hottest new DIY nail wrap designs: great patterns and prints that you apply at home with a blow dryer in mere minutes. They look like high art, not those over-the-counter zebra stripes (not that there's anything wrong with that). And if you have a little one, your wife will love getting one of the mommy-and-me sets. (Check out our faves: Black and White Damask, left, or Decorative Black.) $15 a sheet, JamberryNails.net
Country Style Meets Hipster Convenience
Every urban hipster knows that Mason jars are the new hot home item (even though they've been around since 1858) and stores are selling out of them (frustrating old-school home canners and raising prices). If your mom also likes to maximize the hell out those jars, this is the (inexpensive) get for her: Cuppow Canning Jar Drinking Lids and the BNTO Canning Jar Lunchbox Adaptor. The Cuppow Canning Jar Drinkin Lids (below) sits underneath the lid of a canning jar, creating an eco-friendly and BPA-free travel mug (or kids' sippy cup) out of a Mason jar, while the BNTO separates a canning jar into two compartments so you can carry your chips and guacamole all in the same container. $9.95 each, Cuppow.com
Viral post saying Republicans 'have two daddies now' has MAGA hot and bothered