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Sapphic stars: Are lesbians friend-zoning based on the Zodiac?

woman standing in front of zodiac signs
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The Sapphics are split on this dating question from the heavens.

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Astrology has become a common hobby in recent years, particularly among queer millennials. But at what point does it cross the line into something detrimental?

The question recently came up in the ActualLesbiansOver25 subreddit when one user said she was "friend-zoned" purely because of her astrological sign.

"Itā€™s such a desert out there, and this woman is really friend-zoning me based on my zodiac big 3 and nothing else and refuses to even tell me her sun sign," wrote u/Questioning8. "She said weā€™d have a blast as friends but she didnā€™t see romance based on my big 3. That doesnā€™t even compute to me. how can we be terrible as lovers but great as friends?"

The original poster wasn't the only one thrown by the idea of someone putting so much stock in astrological compatibility right off the bat. Other redditors quickly reassured her that looking to the stars is not a great way to determine whether or not you should date somebody.

Still, it was acknowledged that queer millennial women do tend to be drawn towards astrology ā€” maybe sometimes a little too much.

How did we get here?

"Astrology comes into vogue at times of great change societally because we're breaking open a paradigm of what we thought worked for us," astrologer Chani Nicholas said in an interview shared withThe Advocate in 2020. "It's a very queer phenomenon. I think queers have really always taken to it. We need alternative ways of seeing ourselves or being witnessed."

There's definitely something to the idea of looking for guidance in a world where everything is so uncertain, especially for members of society who don't follow the obvious paths. But queers, of all people, should know that you risk the chance of missing out on something great if you hold on too tightly to expectations ā€” even astrological.

As for what to do in a scenario where you seem to be hitting it off with someone, but they believe your chart could derail things? The reigning opinion seems to be that it actually is a compatibility issue after all, albeit not just in the way Astrology Queers may think.

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