Nymphia Wind has always been hard on herself.
The RuPaul's Drag Raceseason 16 winner recently revealed that the "pressure to do well in my career" has long impacted her mental health. Writing in an essay for the Trevor Project in honor of Asian American and Pacific Islander (AAPI) Heritage Month, Wind opened up about the "moments when I would feel down and unsure of where I fit in my drag, Asian, or queer communities."
"Coming up in drag takes a lot more than the average person would assume," she wrote. "They say we are our own worst critics; I was always hard on myself if I didn’t perform up to my own high standards, or if my look wasn’t perfect."
Wind's essay was penned as a chapter for the fictional book she created during episode 14 of her Drag Race season, “Booked & Blessed." Now, the queen is using Breaking Wind, the Art of Letting Go to reach out to LGBTQ+ AAPI youth.
68 percent of AAPI LGBTQ+ youth reported feeling symptoms of generalized anxiety disorder in the past two weeks, according to the Trevor Project, but those who have social support and access to affirming spaces are less likely to experience negative mental health impacts.
Wind said that "it’s bananas how closely that research mirrors my own experiences," noting that surrounding herself with friends and spending time in the queer community "has really helped my mental health."
Despite her success, Wind said that "I definitely have a bit of performance anxiety." Even after doing shows for years, she explained that "sometimes I still get nervous." What gets her out of them is remembering that she may not be in control of her feelings, but she can control her reaction.
"I personally can’t stop intrusive thoughts and negative feelings, but I can choose how I navigate those moments for myself," Wind wrote.
