On Valentine's Day, let these famous queer couples' love stories inspire you
| 02/14/24
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Love. These days, I think we’re all starting to feel like “It’s the only thing that’s there’s just too little of,” as Jackie DeShannon sang in the 1965 peace anthem What the World Needs Now is Love.
The lyrics go on to specify that it’s “not just for some, but for everyone.”
Related: 22 queer couples through history from ancient Egypt to the White House
In the challenging times we find ourselves living in, love is the silver lining. Or rather, the rainbow lining. It’s what keeps us going in life when the going gets tough. And within the LGBTQ+ community, it’s as abundant as ever — and comes in many wonderful forms. With these couples, we celebrate the beauty, strength, and diversity of queer love.Swanthula and Dracmorda Boulet
courtesy the boulet brothers
Many know this deliciously goth duo for their hit competition series, The Boulet Brothers’ Dragula (its fifth season is now streaming on AMC+ and Shudder). Since 2016, the reality series has explored the darker and more alternative side of drag, rating its contestants on criteria like “drag, filth, horror, and glamour.”
But before Dragula came to fruition, the Brothers (who are not really brothers) were already the official queens of Halloween. For over two decades, the partners in work and life have been the creative forces behind the biggest, spookiest, most fabulous annual event in the West, the Los Angeles Halloween Ball. They also recently released their debut EP, Time to Die, and host a weekly podcast called The Boulet Brothers’ Creatures of the Night.
"He is one of the most loving and nurturing people I’ve ever met," Swanthula Boulet says of Dracmorda. "He makes time for anyone in need because he genuinely cares about the well-being of others. He’s quirky and funny, with the darkest sense of humor I adore."
He’s a true-hearted, good, and honest person. He knows who he is and stands tall to the world with that conviction," Dracmorda adds about Swanthula. "He has great taste, an eye for detail, and a natural ability to just know how to do things.... I am actually in awe of his artistic ability."
The Griners attend the 2023 Met Gala
ANGELA WEISS/AFP via Getty-Images
Though she was no stranger to occasional media attention after dating and eventually marrying one of the WNBA’s biggest stars, Cherelle Griner was thrust into the spotlight in a way she’d never dreamed of. And it was more of a nightmare.
Cherelle’s wife, Brittney Griner, was arrested in Russia in February 2022 for having a vape cartridge in her luggage with less than one gram of cannabis-derived oil, which is illegal in Russia. She was tried on drug charges, convicted, and sentenced to nine years in prison. Fortunately, 10 months after her arrest, Brittney was released on December 8, 2022, after intense negotiations by the Biden administration.
When Brittney and Cherelle made an appearance at the Met Gala last May, Cherelle told correspondent LaLa Anthony on Vogue’s carpet livestream, “This time last year, I was missing my wife, so to have her right here, to be in this moment — breathtaking.”
“It’s everything just to be here with my wife and just able to be here,” Brittney added. “It means so much…. It’s amazing.”
Jared Polis and husband Marlon Reis hold son Caspian in 2013.
Taylor Hill/Getty Images
For Colorado Governor Jared Polis and his husband Marlon Reis, family time takes precedence in their lives — and when he can, Polis is happy to include his family in some of his responsibilities.
“One of the great things about being governor is that our kids [Caspian, 12, and Cora, 9] can sometimes help with some of my duties,” Polis tells The Advocate. “Thanksgiving comes to mind as an example. The kids helped with the annual turkey pardon at the Governor’s Mansion. The kids named the four turkeys we pardoned: Gus, Maple, Pumpkin, and Matilda. And the turkeys spent the night at the house with our family.”
Polis said that after the turkeys were pardoned, they were donated to a nearby animal sanctuary. “Marlon has been a very activist first gentleman, and one of his causes is supporting animals,” Polis adds. “Together, we have hosted cat and dog adoption fairs at the Governor’s Mansion and really worked to elevate protecting Colorado’s wildlife.”
The couple has been together for nearly 20 years and married in 2021. “He’s been really a wonderful first gentleman for the people of Colorado,” Polis gushed.
Newlyweds Zeke Smith (left) and Nico Santos
Shutterstock
Zeke Smith, best known as the first trans man to compete on Survivor, and Nico Santos, who’s displayed his comedic and acting chops on shows like Superstore and films like Crazy Rich Asians, wed in November in Palm Springs, California.
We feel a special connection to the happy hubbies since much of The Advocate’s editorial team was in the same room when the two got engaged. After delivering speeches about LGBTQ+ representation at the 2022 GLAAD Media Awards, Smith suddenly dropped down on one knee and proposed to Santos. Moved to tears, Santos quickly and happily accepted.
“For us, we’ve been together for almost six years,” Smith recently told People in an exclusive feature on their wedding. “We own a home together, have a joint bank account. We’re each other’s emergency contacts. By all sorts of usual metrics, we are married. But actually having the ceremony, making it legal, it’s about becoming a family. We’re in it forever. Through thick and thin and easy and hard. We’re going to be the person that’s there for the other one.”
Husbands Frederick Kearney (left) and David Lauterstein
courtesy of subjects
Popular menswear brand Nasty Pig was founded in 1994, the creation of David Lauterstein and his now husband Frederick Kearney. And while the brand is now heralded as the first to launch the fetish-as-fashion movement that major designers include in runway shows today, Lauterstein recalls the backlash Nasty Pig received when it first opened its doors. “We were wildly unpopular and very misunderstood,” he explains. “We had horrific notes slid under the door of our store. One said, ‘Stop Spreading AIDS.’”
While its clothing and name are sexually charged, at its heart, Nasty Pig is a love story. It was built on the intimate connection between David and Frederick, the loyal love they have for the queer community and their shared passion of fetish and fashion.
"AIDS took down a few friends within the first couple of years of my coming out. The fact that the thing I most desired — intimacy with other men — came with a potentially fatal disease was a mindfuck like no other," says Lauterstein. "It was terrifying. It really caused so many in our community to want to hide from their sexual identities. Many hoped to blend in so that they wouldn’t be defined by their queerness or be thought of as diseased. I had no interest in blending in. I felt that my queerness was a gift. Nasty Pig was a rallying cry against the hetero-normalization that had gripped the community. Frederick and I saw it as an opportunity to reclaim sexual positivity and to celebrate gay identity."