Pride, prejudice and PTA meetings: A guide for LGBTQ+ families this school year

From school supply shopping to navigating new routines, back-to-school season is a busy time for families filled with anticipation, coordination, and first-day-of-school jitters.

But, for LGBTQ+ families facing increasing threats from school boards and statehouses alike, there's an extra layer of worry to contend with.

So, what do you need to know about the current landscape for LGBTQ+ families in schools — and what can you do to help? Family Equality, the leading national organization for current and future LGBTQ+ families, has the answers you're looking for.

As we enter back-to-school season, there's good news and bad news. The bad news: In 2024, we've continued to see state legislatures across the country attempting to keep LGBTQ+ topics out of the classroom, with Louisiana and Wyoming both passing their own version of the infamous "Don't Say Gay/Trans" law this year.

The good news is that the vast majority of the bills introduced this year failed. In fact, over 50 other attempts to pass similar legislation failed—even in deeply conservative states like Georgia, West Virginia, Missouri, and Nebraska.

That's not all! Since we started seeing these dangerous bills crop up in recent years, we've been hard at work reversing their damage. In Florida, Family Equality scored a massive victory nullifying the most harmful aspects of the nation's first Don't Say Gay/Trans law, with Florida Governor Ron DeSantis walking back his own book ban bill after admitting that it went too far. Similarly, a federal judge in New Hampshire ruled their Don't Say Gay/Trans law was unconstitutional thanks to the hard work of state advocates. At the same time, voters across the country have overwhelmingly rejected school board candidates affiliated with anti-LGBTQ+ groups like Moms for Liberty.

In short, despite threats from statehouses and school boards, we're seeing leaders, advocates, and families at every level of the government sending a clear message: We will not allow our families and our histories to be erased, silenced, or made to feel unwelcome.

You can take concrete steps to send this message to your family's school this year.

• Get a conversation started early. It may feel intimidating to introduce yourself to school officials, especially if you live in a district that appears openly hostile to LGBTQ+ issues. But, the reality is the only way your school can meet your needs is if you share what those needs are in the first place. As author and lecturer Brené Brown says, "It's hard to hate up close." It's one thing to push anti-LGBTQ+ practices and policies in theory and quite another to implement them when you know the faces and names of the actual people impacted by these choices.

• Know your rights. Your child has the right to an equal educational environment. Don't be bullied by school officials into thinking that you need to accept a hostile environment for your child. Between the new Title IX rules and our legal victories in several states, we now have legal tools to fight against censorship in our communities. Under Title IX, for example, schools can't discriminate against LGBTQ+ people and are required to protect students from harassment, bullying, physical harm, or discrimination. If you feel your family has faced these issues, talk to your school's Title IX coordinator, explore Family Equality's resources, and consider filing a complaint with the Department of Education's Office for Civil Rights.

• Find your community. It takes a village to raise a child! Even if you live in an area without many LGBTQ+ parents, other marginalized identities may be similarly struggling with challenges to an equal educational environment for their children. By building across these divides, you can find an intersectional community to ensure that all of your children are able to thrive and enjoy school. This applies to your children, too! Encourage them to find other students they can lean on and turn to for support, such as through the school's Gay/Straight Alliance (GSA). (Federal law guarantees your child's right to start a GSA if the school allows other student-led clubs!)

No matter how you're feeling about the start of the school year, know this: There are ways to ensure your child feels safe and welcomed at school. While knowing when or where to start might be challenging, organizations like Family Equality are here with resources, policy experts, and advocates to help!

Nikhil Vashee is the Director of Education Law and Policy & Senior Policy Counsel for Family Equality, the nation's leading advocacy group for LGBTQ+ families.

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